KayKayJay

hermionejg:

oceanaroll:

oatmeal:

I don’t really play console games, but when I used to play xbox 360 what I heard inside my headset was primarily “OMG FAG FUCK YOU DIE FAGNIGGER ASSPICKLE COCKTHUNDER FAG ASSPICKLE etc,” or some variation thereof.

I started playing on Steam about a year ago, and people who speak into their mics over there seem WAY more pleasant.  Granted, you still get your share of idiotic 13 year olds squealing obscenities at you through cracked prepubescent voices, but it’s better than Xbox live. 

Based on that, and primarily on playing Left4Dead, I noticed that anytime a girl was playing everyone acts REALLY nice to her (even if she throws a molly at the team and sets us all on fire).  That’s where the inspiration for my last comic came from.

Outside of steam, it sounds like it’s still pretty horrible for women to play games.  Is this true?  A lot of people are talking of rape threats, sexism, harassment, and a lot of other awful things.  I’m a guy and I barely talk into my mic, so I’ll concede that my view of things is probably very skewed.

That being said, I apologize to any female gamers who I offended.  I didn’t mean to perpetuate the idea that women are treated more nicely while playing games online.  It sounds like in a lot of cases the opposite is true.

In short:  I’m sorry for making a stupid comic today.

Lastly, apologies on the internet mean about as much as farts do in outer space. So I went ahead and donated $1,000 to the Women Against Abuse foundation.

Hugs and asspickles,

-Matthew

Now that is how you make an apology. I love The Oatmeal.

fuck yeah the oatmeal <3

anberlyn:

isisgodiva:

Mikael Mikaelson…

Every time I think of the creativity that went into coming up with this name. It’s right up there with Renesmee. :/

They’re Scandinavians right? In that case, his name shouldn’t even be Mikael Mikaelson. Only his children (maybe only his sons) should carry Mikaelson as their last names. His last name would have been something else or (His father’s first name)-son.

No Scandinavian countries follow that way of naming their children, and haven’t for hundreds of years. Iceland does though!

fishingboatproceeds:

Four different people asked this.

Guys.

I HAVE A CHILD.

lightbuld19:

rawfoodvegan:

lightbuld19:

how do people not have facebook still like even if you don’t like facebook you still have to have one it’s one of the rules of life

I’ve been Facebook free for months, don’t tell me what is required of me. I don’t have to fit into society, I can be my own person. Marilyn Monroe didn’t have Facebook, and she was beautiful. So maybe you should think before you tell people how to live their lives. Some people can’t afford computers, and have diseases that don’t allow them to go on Facebook— while others are struggling with a Facebook addiction, how will that make them feel? Pressuring them to stay on. Think before you speak. Got a problem? message me.

Ok

jpegartifacts:

I thought Santorum didn’t believe in pulling out.

the bible has the worst fandom

well you can’t deny that it’s come out with some really good fanart

#they do tend to whitewash the characters though

schizoidembolism:

I’ve already tackled the whole “natural” argument to some extent, but I really must establish on this blog the sheer lunacy of homophobia. In all cases, it’s based entirely on irrationality and groundless accusations. I’d hope this was obvious, but allow me to systematically shoot down the various arguments that continue to pop up despite their glaring flaws.

“Homosexuality is unnatural.”

Interesting hypothesis, given that homosexuality has been witnessed in hundreds of animal species, including pigs, dolphins and some of our ape cousins. On the other hand, precisely one species is demonstrably capable of homophobia.

And even assuming homosexuality somehow was unnatural, so what? Since when has humanity given much heed to being natural? We have countless atypical practices, including the homophobia example already presented. If natural means occurring in nature, then all modern medicine is unnatural. Living beyond thirty? None of that in the life of a natural human being.

Unless you’re willing to discard all the grossly unnatural advances that humanity enjoys in this enlightened age of science, you have no business calling homosexuality unnatural.

“Homosexuality is immoral.”

How? According to your holy book? I fail to see how something written millennia ago by men brought up in an atmosphere of bigotry should be held up as a beacon of morality. Anybody who takes the Bible literally must also favour slavery, misogyny and violent intolerance of other faiths.

Secondly, and most damningly, how can a victimless act be immoral? Consensual intimacy affects nobody but those directly involved. The only way it might affect somebody else is if they got intimate in the middle of a public street, but I’d be as put off by a straight couple doing that as two men or two women, so the gender is an irrelevant variable. If somebody was trapped alone in the universe with no other living creature, immorality would be literally impossible, because nothing they did would ever affect anybody else.

If the only reason you think something is immoral is because somebody told you so, I would seriously urge you to re-evaluate your logical process. At the very least, actually read the Bible all the way through with an open mind. If you can do that and honestly tell me you didn’t raise an eyebrow even once, I think you’re completely deranged, but I can at least respect that you know what you’re talking about. This is more than I can say for most fundamentalists.

“If everyone was gay, the human race would go extinct.”

Maybe. Assuming we somehow forgot how to reproduce without needing to insert rod A into slot B. Little thing called artificial insemination, guys. Gay folk are no less inclined towards wanting to continue their bloodline, i.e. the one thing evolution depends on. Frankly, considering how fundamentalists seem to view sex as the ultimate evil, I’m surprised this isn’t embraced already. Imagine having whatever unreasonable number of kids you like without the hassle of all those orgasms!

I do question why a God who wanted us to have as little sex as possible would even invent sex, let alone make us want to have as much of it as possible as often as possible, but who am I to question the intellect that designed such wonders as cancer and birth defects? Hell, a world full of gay people would have way fewer unintentional pregnancies, dramatically reducing the number of abortions required. Boom.

Of course, this is all overlooking the rather glaring fact that assuming homosexuality will somehow become the norm if we give gay people basic rights is like assuming that legalising necrophilia would make everybody want to try it. Fact is, the majority of dudes don’t fancy other dudes and the majority of women don’t fancy other women. Ever notice how countries that give gay people full rights don’t suddenly change their flags to a rainbow pattern and see a dramatic increase in the sale of arseless chaps?

Gayness doesn’t somehow spread like some contagion. It’s just another personal taste that you’ll either get or won’t. Like how most people my age love the drivel the music industry pumps out these days, while I have a violent allergic reaction to it. You don’t see me trying to call Lady Gaga immoral or unnatural, though I’d certainly call her horrible. Don’t fancy having a man sitting on your face? Good for you. Just don’t complain if the bloke next to you is up for it.

To conclude, if somebody can give me an argument for homophobia that I can’t blow away, I’ll pose provocatively while wearing a gimp suit. I look forward to adding to this list.

shannathebanana:

What do you mean J.K. Rowling’s FIRST book for adults? What about all her other books, for which I have spent thousands of dollars on conventions, costumes, merchandise, candy, and tattoos? Totes for adults.